The First 3 to 5 Minutes

"Visitors will decide in the first 3 to 5 minutes of visiting your church whether they will return."

1. Where did we pick up that bit of marketing savvy? Is it true? I've heard it several places and each time it's left me feeling doubtful. It definitely stresses the need to be warm and welcoming to new folks, and to have the place cleaned up with easy access to things (like parking, the nursery and restrooms). But has the church succumbed so completely to consumer marketing that we are entirely dependent on first impressions?

2. Many times my "first impression" of a person and place has been completely wrong. What I thought I would not like I ended up enjoying or realizing I needed. What happens if the congregation is well trained and excels at first impressions, but isn't authentic and transparent in sharing the love of God in its relationships?

3. How does the church help people transition from being "consumers shopping for a church" to being "seekers of Christ?" Is it by being warm and friendly in the first 3 to 5 minutes and feeling like the job is done?

4. What if we removed the 'open doors' tagline and required that new people be sponsored? Aside from the charge of exclusiveness, what would happen to church growth? I am a Rotarian. We don't have people just walk into our meetings; they are invited by a Rotarian. We take them to the Rotary meeting, introduce them to others, and bring them back several times before asking them to become part of our club. Rotarians balance first impressions with personal relationships.

5. Something tells me that if we truly care about other people connecting with love of Christ that is expressed in the body of Christ, the first 3 to 5 minutes will take care of themselves.

UM Mission Confusion?

The mission of the United Methodist Church is “to make disciples of Jesus Christ.” GC08 will consider changing that to add “for the transformation of the world” (¶120). While it has a nice sound to it, I’m not sure it is an improvement on what we have.

Some might argue that the addition changes “making disciples” from being our primary purpose to being a “means” or method by which we transform the world. In other words, it says our real goal is to transform our world, and that the reason to become a disciple of Jesus Christ is so that we can achieve that goal.

It’s definitely a “Methodist” statement, which means it is sufficiently ambiguous. It leaves wide open for interpretation “how” we are going to transform the world and what such transformation would look like. That’s the perfect scenario for any cause group to argue that their issue deserves priority attention since it is part of our “mission.”

My hunch is that our boards and agencies will see the two parts of the statement as having equal leverage and then choose which one to emphasize. And since the preponderance of the evidence so far indicates we either aren’t comfortable with “making disciples” (or don’t know how), then we’ll see more and more material on how we good Methodists can and should be transforming the world.

You would think that with all the extensive talk about our declining membership, everyone would want to be clearly focused on making disciples of Jesus Christ. Of course, we don’t work to make disciples just to grow the church, but if we are making disciples, the church will end up growing. And if people become actual disciples of Jesus Christ and aren’t just names added to the rolls, then (as Paul beautifully says in Romans 12) they will be transformed, becoming people who transform the world.

Transformation of our sinful, broken, wayward world is important. Note that even in the Great Commission (Matthew 28) that after Jesus says “Go and make disciples of all nations,” he then says “teach them to obey everything I have commanded you.” If you get into the Word and apply his teachings, you will work to transform the world. That’s always been the Methodist way: warmed heart, accountability group immersed in scripture, and living the faith by “doing no harm, doing good, and attending all the ordinances of God.” (General Rules, ¶103)

The world transforming aspect of our mission is already expressed in the Discipline in ¶124: Our Mission in the World – God’s self-revelation in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ summons the church to ministry in the world through witness by word and deed in light of the church’s mission…As servants of Christ we are sent into the world to engage in the struggle for justice and reconciliation. We seek to reveal the love of God for men, women, and children of all ethnic, racial, cultural, and national backgrounds and to demonstrate the healing power of the gospel with those who suffer.

The new statement sounds more politically correct and is already being used by many of our church leaders, but will it serve us well?

A World Without Cool

Ever been enticed to keep up with the latest "cool" thing? Ever had a child worry about whether their clothes, or more critically, their presence at some event, would come across as "cool" or not? Of course you have. Ever had your church feel the pressure to imitate the latest "cool" event another church has? We live in an ever-changing world of "cool-ness," that keeps us unsettled, unsatisfied, unhappy, and always looking for what's out there. It's a climate perfect for those ready to market and sell us on the next best thing.

The other day I read Ariah Fine's blogpost This Is How It All Begins about Adbusters Magazine
and their "anti-cool" issue. His post shows an ad with the following quote:

“I want to live in a world where nothing is cool, where things actually are as they appear. That would be extraordinary. I want food and a living environment
that are not part of some suit’s strategic vision. Cool has betrayed all of us. I want reality.” - Jessica Masse, Maine, USA

I'm sure the reality Jessica wants is not the stuff of made-for-TV reality shows. But what is it? Is it the non-packaged, or marketed, authenticity of life? How can the church offer its authenticity in a commercialized world of "cool-ness?" And, more importantly, does the church remember how to offer the message of redemption in a world without cool?

The church was not designed for a “consumer” oriented world. Ever since we basically allowed ourselves to be defined as consumers, it has required an adaptation to make the relationships and nature of the church apply. Some churches have done well, finding ways to make trade-offs, and sometimes force-fitting the life of faith into the world of the market. They continually keep up with cool, and they have enjoyed acclaimed success for their efforts.

There's a large group of churches that are so turned-inward that they pay little heed to relating to the world. And then there are a few who circle up the wagons and see themselves as an alternative to the world. They define themselves by exclusiveness.

I think most, however, fall in between the extremes, not sure how much to adapt, or how much to compromise, and end up simply looking for something that “works.” They don't expect to lead the way in the church coolness factor, but they do like to show up at the party. So we try to relate to the world by keeping up with the latest jargon, incorporating the latest visuals and songs in worship, going for the trendiest materials from the publishing houses, and doing whatever else we can think of to show the world we're trying to reach that "we're players in the game (of coolness.)"

You think I jest? In just about any town you can find homes where the family chose to join a certain church because it's the coolest one in town. They like having the church's logo on their car and clothing, to show others they know how to be at the "right" place. Nothing wrong with them enjoying the cool events being offered, but you quickly get the feeling that church is just another piece in the family's/individual's "coolness" ensemble.

So, what would "church" look like in a world without "cool?" What would happen if we determined to relate to the world through service rather than trends? What if we put down the cool, and took up the cross?

As you welcome others...

A relatively new member shared a story with me yesterday that made my heart sing. She told me about taking her sister to a United Methodist church, and she told me I could share the story.

Her sister, with family support, finally took her son (under 3 years old) and left an abusive situation. My friend flew out to support her sister and told her, "You're making a new start, and you're going to go to church." She knew her sister would resist, so she made her plans ahead. She looked up United Methodist Churches on the web and called a church in the town, also named Trinity. She called and got the worship times and told them they were going to visit on such and such a Sunday.

As expected, the sister resisted, wondering what those church people would think of her, and how they'd treat this single mom from not the best of situations. But they went to worship. The people so warmly welcomed them, they stayed and enjoyed the fellowship time afterwards.
The sister had to make her son leave - he was having such a good time there.

When they got in the car her sister looked at her and exclaimed with amazement, "What just happened? Those people didn't even know me and I already feel as if they are part of my family!" My friend said she tried to explain to her sister that that is what being part of a church is all about.

Anyway, that was a couple of months ago and her sister hasn't missed attending. In fact, this coming Sunday her sister is joining the church and having her son baptized! Thanks be to God.

I want to carry this story around with me. When we get to General Conference and deal with all those debates about such and such, I want to remember that what it really boils down to is whether the people called Methodists remember how to welcome others with the love of Christ. And I want to delight in people who do what it takes to get their sisters, brothers, friends, or whomever to "taste and see that the Lord is good" (and the Lord's people!).

Grandma Evangelism

Sometimes you think of the right thing to say, when the moment is over. Yesterday, on my way home from teaching about Need Oriented Evangelism I thought of the illustration that would have helped. It's one I've used in sermons and other classes.

I was trying to show the point that small churches don't have to think only in terms of "programs" to address people needs in their community. It works just fine when one person takes some initiative, or when "two or three gather in Christ's name" to be the church for someone else.

The church I served last, in the upstate, was a relocation and restart. A small congregation of about 50 moved from a declining mill village location to a new site a couple of miles away, but right in the middle of several growing sub-divisions. It was also right in the middle of several large established churches. The mostly elderly congregation had little to offer in terms of programs and classes, especially when residents could easily "shop" for what they wanted in the nearby churches.

What it did have was several Grandmas' with a desire to show God's love. When new residents would visit the church, the Grandmas would swoop in and connect with the children. They staffed the nursery, and told the parents, "You go worship while we take care of the kids." Many of the new residents were relocated to the area by their jobs, meaning the family grandparents were in other states. The substitute Grandmothers connected with the children, sometimes seeing them during the week - some even attending little league games.

With such connections in place, families began to join. It was only a trickle of one or two families at first. But those families soon brought new friends along with them. Within a couple of years there was a a solid base of members upon which to build. Now the church has about 500 in worship each week, so the evangelism of the Grandmas' keeps bearing fruit.

Needs Oriented Evangelism simply means that the discovered needs of "the stranger in our midst," "the least among us," and the one facing life without Christ trump the perceived needs of the church. Thus whatever church looses its life for Christ's sake, will gain it.

Baptism Reaffirmation and Need-Oriented Evangelism

This Sunday the lectionary takes us to Matthew's account of the baptism of Jesus. We started a few years ago having in the service the Congregation Reaffirmation of the Baptismal Covenant on this Sunday. At the close of the service, people are invited to come to the font, and place their hands in the water to reaffirm their baptism. They can also take one of the smooth stones from the font, to carry with them as a reminder of the gift of God's covenant.

Last year I had two or three people come to me after the service saying how meaningful it was. A couple of them asked why we haven't done this before, and I'm pretty sure they had been at previous reaffirmations. My point is, it's all in God's timing. Previously they weren't at a point in their journey where baptismal reaffirmation meant something to them. But that year, the message of God's love, the symbolism of cleansing and rebirth, or the significance of forgiveness and a covenantal life touched their point of need and yearning.

We all need to remember this, so we don't grow weary in well doing. The best apple pie ever cooked means little to someone with no appetite. The best gift of all, a relationship with Christ, will go untouched by those so full of this life that there's no room for anything else.

Tomorrow after the worship services I'll drive to Clover to lead a workshop on Need-Oriented Evangelism (N-OE). People have needs. How do we identify and connect with their needs as a portal for a) demonstrating God's love through our service, b) establishing a relationship, and c), introducing them to a life of discipleship in Christ? (There's my workshop in a nutshell!)

The bias of N-OE, which basically comes out of Natural Church Development, is programmatic. The quick fix is to do some sort of survey of the community to discover the dominant common need (child care? after-school programs? divorce recovery? etc.?) and then to create a program administered by the church which will lure the targeted population in.

The idea is that those who respond to the program will thus appreciate what the church does, and join. (I've noticed there is little attention given to what to do if the public responds. How will they be introduced to the life of the community of faith, and how will they learn what it means to give one's-self over to a life in relationship with Christ?)

This is a large church orientation which can be frustrating to churches with an average church worship attendance of about 200 or less. Churches of that size can muster the resources to do the necessary program, but it takes a significant commitment of the energy in the congregation to make it happen. Success is not guaranteed. Thus if it doesn't work, doesn't bring in new people, a failure mentality sets in and provides a basis for that self-defeating comment, "We've tried that before."

For a large church, the commitment to a new program calls for a much smaller percentage of their resources (people and money). So if it doesn't work out, they can more easily chalk it up to experience and move on to the next promising opportunity.

How does all this tie in with baptismal reaffirmation, you may ask? We really don't need programs to do N-OE if we are faithful to living out our baptismal covenant. Baptism commissions us to serve in Christ's name. On that basis, church members can develop a sensitivity to the needs of others and then a) respond to them by demonstrating the love of God through service, b) establish a relationship with them, and c) introduce them to a life of discipleship in Christ, with or without the church having an official program for it. Amazing, isn't it?

I sometimes wonder if the purpose of church programs is to keep us busy and give us the feeling we're doing something while we avoid personal engagement in the life of discipleship. So, to not grow weary in well-doing, I will pray that this Sunday will be God's time for another someone in the fellowship to discover their baptismal calling, and to say, this is meaningful and I want to help make a difference, and maybe there's a need God's calling me to pay attention to, and....well, guess that's why we call Him the Living Water.

Convincing others we really care.

Yesterday afternoon I participated in an event at the county courthouse. One of Trinity's members, Jack Howle, was being installed as the Chief Public Defender for the 3rd Judicial Circuit. Last year our state legislature passed the Indigent Defense Act of 2007 to coordinate and standardize the public defender offices across the state, and to give the give the public defenders a more equitable status with the solicitor's office. Our own Rep. Murrell Smith was instrumental in getting it passed. It was a needed reform of the system and I understand it has become a model for other states.

Jack was the right man for the job and I felt honored to bring the invocation and benediction. Jack has been the Chief Public Defender in Sumter for ten years and has many more years experience in the field. He is calm and consistent and has a quiet determination to do what is right. Every Tuesday he is at my early morning men's Bible study and is very active in our church. Those who need the services of a public defender are fortunate to have such a dedicated and experienced attorney who sees his work as a call to ministry through his baptism.

Jack's comments after the swearing in acknowledged family and colleagues and the work of the public defenders office. What stuck with me were some of his closing words when he said that the general public often has a erroneous and negative view of the people who must rely on public defenders. Jack said that they are simply people for whom the circumstances and choices of their lives have put them in a position to depend on the expertise of others they cannot afford. "The most difficult part of this job," he said, "is convincing our clients that we really do care about them."

Jack, of course, was talking about the public defender's role, but I immediately thought about the role of the church. How good a job have we done convincing people that we really care about them? It doesn't matter to them if we can share the way of salvation if they perceive that we really don't care about them. What's the old saying? No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care.

Jesus is not a commodity that we can package, market and distribute to others. Jesus is known in a relationship of grace that is passed from heart to heart. Instead of evangelism and church growth programs, maybe we need to back up and re-train ourselves on being truly caring people. Perhaps we need to pray for hearts of compassion, and then the ability to break apart the stereotypes of the church so that the world can see through us that God indeeds cares. To what lengths are we willing to go to convince others that because of Christ, we actually, really, do care about them?

Speaking the Language

What do math teachers do in the school cafeteria?
They divide their lunches between them.


What kind of sandwich sinks to the bottom of your stomach?
A sub sandwich!


What did one hotdog say to the other?
Please be frank with me.


By now you either think I've gone crazy posting such jokes, or you're laughing. If you're laughing, then you're probably in the third grade, because that's the age these jokes are directed toward.

The book of jokes containing these was on my desk this week with a note. It was left for me by one of the women working on a new ministry we plan to start next year in the church. It read: Pastor Stephen, Thought you'd want a joke book for the kids, to get ready for The Dock!

A small group has been meeting to design a ministry to help us do a better job communicating the Bible to elementary children. The Dock will be a place where kids come to launch out into God's Word. I'm not sure what all has been planned, but I feel confident of one thing, they "get it."

They understand you have to speak the language of the people you're trying to reach. If we're going to reach young elementary kids, we have to know what interests them, how they understand things, and what makes them laugh. We have to enter their world to help them become ready for a new world.

This is basically true no matter the group we want to reach. As Paul said, "To those under the law I became as one under the law...to those outside the law I became as one outside the law...to the weak I became weak that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, that I might by all means save some." (1 Cor 9:21-22)

We have to leave the comfort of where we are and the security of what we know to learn how to speak to others. Unfortunately, too much of what's called evangelism in the church is really a marketing and screening process. We promote the gospel to lure people in and keep the ones who are already like us, or who are ready to "speak our language."

I remember many years ago visiting in the home of a church member, an elderly widow who lived alone. On her coffee table were copies of a dirt bike magazine. I had to ask her about it. No big deal, she basically said. Her teenage grandson loved racing dirt bikes. She ordered the subscription so she could learn something about it, and thus be able to talk with him about what he loved. And when he came over, there'd be something there he'd enjoy looking at. She "got it" too. May the rest of us "get it," even if it's something as minor as learning to appreciate third-grade humor.

Jesus Keeps Coming To Church

First, he showed up three weeks ago, right when we were busy with our big Welcome Sunday. He came in looking just like one of the homeless people we often get from the shelter a couple of blocks away. I wasn't sure it was him, and did the usual procedure of alerting the ushers. In the past, some of our shelter visitors have taken to roaming the halls and stopping folks asking for money. But now we have a pass-code on the door leading to the Nursery wing and ushers have been asked to intercede if the pan-handling starts.

But right before the worship processional began that day, I saw Jesus seated at the back by one of our members, who pleasantly pointed out to me we have a guest today. And our member took Jesus to the lunch we were having that day, and apparently invited him back.

The next Sunday I saw him walking up the street before the early service, stooped over a bit, with a sort of shuffle -step. Afterwards he asked about a Sunday School class. Another member said she'd show him to a class of people about the same age, and led him away.

I thought that was the end of it, but last Sunday, when I got to the front of the sanctuary at the second service, I saw him sitting in the back. Unmistakable - crumpled clothes, mis-aligned smile, and hair done by fingers, sitting in a sea of properness.

Yesterday, just after I'd started my Inquirer's Class, for new and prospective members, the door opened, and in he came. We had to stop for a moment while some of the folks made room for another chair in the circle. Then we continued our introductions to one another.

We learned that Jesus had a name, a pretty name, Elenita. Had recently moved into supervised adult-living apartments nearby. And was frustrated because each Sunday, the supervisor says she isn't supposed to walk the three blocks away from the apartment, but she insists she is going to church. Whereupon the other class members encouraged her.

And on the Sabbath, he went to the synagogue, as was his custom. (Luke 4:16.) Thank you, Lord, for honoring us with your presence. Thank you, members, for your welcoming spirit. Maybe this "Open Doors, Open Hearts, Open Minds" marketing line means something after all.

Growth by Numbers 2

After that long post on growth I thought of an illustration I've used teaching. I served a suburban church that grew steadily. However, in its early years as a re-located congregation, growth was difficult. The mostly elderly congregation in a first building had very little to offer in terms of programs, etc. Added to that was the fact that the church was surrounded by well-established large churches of various denominations.

Then some new families with children visited, and they returned. They got involved and began to bring other new families from their sub-divisions. From that growth programs developed and more growth occurred. But what connected these first families to the church? The surrogate grandmothers.

One mom said, "My husband's company moved us several states from our families. We tried the new little church and immediately a sweet woman took our boys. She took interest in them, brought them home-made cookies, and had them over to her house. She became their South Carolina grandma."

With nothing really to offer in terms of promotions or programs, the church grew because the grandma's gave what they had, their love - in this case expressed as genuine care and interest in others. Guess you could say, they grew the old-fashioned way....

Growing by the Numbers

I wonder if people still paint by the numbers. You've seen those kits you buy with a picture outlined and the sections numbered to correspond to little containers of paint. They are for sale because we like difficult things made simple for us.

So, I'm going to make it simple to understand growth in a church, class, youth group, etc. It's as simple as 1, 2, or 3. It's growth by promotions, programs, or people. (See I even got them to all start with the same letter!)

1. Promotions. You can attract people with a big event, or something out of the ordinary. Churches have unique rallies (like a biker rally) or a special speaker (like a Christian athelete or celebrity). Youth groups are always looking to create events that are off the edge, something that will get the kids talking and will bring other youth to check it out.

Promotionalism infiltrates standard church events. Vacation Bible Schools, once a summer enrichment for the church's children, are now promoted as attraction events, with grand themes and characters, videos and logos. Worship (called "seeker services") is now designed for this in some churches. And preachers have adopted it. I just heard of a mega-church pastor in the upstate who preached a sermon on repentance while lying in a casket. I'm sure that got people talking about it to their friends. And it has the preacher working to come up with a fresh act.

One of the difficulites of promotion growth is that you have to keep doing something new and different to get noticed. Once churches were unique for having coffee during worship, but no more. Used to be you could stand out if you had a wild-game supper event. Now even the wild is common.

2. Programs. This is the most common method of growth in the church today. Create a quality program that meets the needs of people. This could be a Bible study program, a life situation program (such as parenting, divorce recovery or marriage enrichment), a 12-step program, children's ministry, music, missions, or whatever.

This method is reinforced by denominational supply stores and para-church organizations that package programs and sell products. In fact we now have the term "needs-oriented evangelism," which basically instructs churches to determine the needs of people in their community and offer programs that address those needs.

This approach fits in nicely with the consumer orientation of our culture. People can, and do, shop around the churches for the programs that best suit their needs. Program growth works, but to what are the people connected - the program? the church? or Christ?

3. People. Surprise, surprise, growth also occurs person to person. When a friend or someone you respect introduces you to someone who is influential in their life, you usually take note. This method takes longer: longer for the individual to become a disciple and longer for the numbers to begin to add up. Smith Barney Brokerage Firm once had an ad where they said, "We make money the old fashioned way, we earn it." This is the old-fashioned way the church has grown (seems to me even Jesus used it).

There doesn't seem to be a lot of emphasis on the people to people method. We'd rather the promotions and programs do the work without having to get involved personally. Person to person growth demands more of the Christian, you have to be real in your own faith and you have to extend yourself to others. The people (or relationship) method was illumined by missionary/evangelist D.T.Niles years ago when he said, "Evangelism is one beggar telling another where to find bread."

4. There really isn't a fourth, just checking to see if you were paying attention. But I do have a closing comment, or two. I'm not denouncing promotions or programs. I make use of them as well. I just think we depend on them too much as the answer for our calling to share the good news of forgiveness and redemption in Christ. And smaller churches that have trouble creating or sustaining programs, begin to think they can't grow. They can't compete with larger churches in promotions and programs. Then their self esteem suffers because they are told they have nothing to offer.

Finally, maybe this is stretching it, but my simplistic three have a parallel in the world of sales. Stores attract and sell by 1) door-buster events, 2) quality products, and 3) a reputation built up by word-of-mouth. I would like to know, for the church, which method has the most lasting effect.